MessagesofLove_YouLoveMe

Welcome to The Salvation Army USA Eastern Territory Women's Ministries Website

Women’s Ministries Programs

Theme:

“Messages of Love”

You Love Me?

Dealing with Anger

Publications Department

National Headquarters

Education—February 2008

Decorations

Create a relaxing atmosphere by dimming the lights and burning fragrant candles. Play soft background music.

Refreshments

Nothing is more soothing than a bowl of homemade soup with fresh, fragrant bread. Serve chamomile or peppermint herbal tea, which are known for their relaxing qualities.

Program Ideas

Speaker

Invite an expert on anger management to share statistics on anger–related topics as well as techniques on dealing with anger.

Group Discussion

Break into groups of four or five and discuss the following:

1. What makes you angry?

2. What were the consequences of your anger?

3. What could you have done to address this anger?

Controlling Anger

Anger is a natural emotion, experienced by all, but how we handle anger is important. It is perfectly normal to feel angry, but, mishandled anger is the cause of many problems in our lives. We need to learn appropriate ways to handle it.

Admit You’re Angry. It is tempting to deny your anger. But this doesn’t help. Identify the problem, and then find a friend you trust and share your feelings with them.

Accept the Blame. Often we attempt to blame others for our anger. The Bible doesn’t tell us that it’s wrong to be angry, but it is wrong to express our anger in ways that hurt others.

Recognize the Cause. There is rarely one cause for anger, but often a combination. We get angry to hide our feelings of being hurt, worried, and criticized or of feeling inadequate. These feelings may be too difficult for us to admit and deal with and so we express them in anger. Examine what makes you angry. When you become aware of those hidden feelings, you are on your way to controlling your anger.

How Do You Respond? Watch out for what triggers your anger. Wait until you cool down and then decide on a course of action. If the problem is small, it is usually a good idea to deal with it immediately. For larger problems, you should think through all of

the issues before taking action. Try to stop hostile thoughts, feelings and actions when they deserve no further attention and are not effective. In

All Situations, Pray. God knows all about our anger and invites us to talk to Him about it. His Holy Spirit can help us to do what would be impossible in our own strength. He will guide us in our actions.

—Adapted from material by Steve Wilson Faith & Friends, The Salvation Army, Canada

Helpful Websites

The following websites on anger management have helpful information:

www.angermangementonline.com www.angerfree.com/amt.html http://www.forgiver.net/anger.htm http://www.angermgmt.org

Devotions

The Anger of Jesus

Our Lord was not given to tidy explanations. He was righteous—committed to revealing the righteous nature of His Father. His words were clear strong and angry when anger was called for. Jesus was known to rebuke the disciples, the Pharisees, the crowd who denied children access to Him, false teachers, even the weather.

God is angry when the righteous are persecuted and clearly states that He will avenge their blood (See 2 Thessalonians. 1:6–20). Mark tells us that Jesus is angry with those who attribute God’s power to Satan, sternly warning that this sin would be unforgiven. It would be unforgiven, not because God would refuse forgiveness, but because those engaged in it would be condemning themselves.

Jesus’ anger was displayed on two occasions connected with the Temple, once at the beginning of His ministry and at the end. Such repetition and focus reinforces the importance of the event, pointing not only to the edifice at Jerusalem but to the temples of our souls which God demands to be clean and filled with prayer.

Does sin—our own and that of others—make us angry? God hates sin, and we should, as Jude put it, “despise even the very appearance of it.” When children copy their elders and shoot each other in schoolyards, we should be angry. We should be angry enough to demand that something be done to ensure it will never happen again. When our Christian brothers and sisters are persecuted by godless governments and terrorists, we should be

angry and muster all of our resources to help them. When we ourselves do something that we know God hates, we should be angry enough to stop our wrong behavior and cast ourselves upon God’s grace. And we should remember that the longer we make excuses, both for ourselves and for sinful behavior in others, the more we incur the wrath of God who hates sin. God hates sin because it destroys people whom He loves.

Too often we are angry about personal insults. We sometimes vow revenge over things as small as being cut off in traffic or gossiped about over coffee break. This is not the kind of anger that marked the walk of Jesus on earth. When He was personally attacked, we read that He answered not a word. When he was nailed to a cross, the prayer on His

lips was for forgiveness for His attackers.

If Jesus came today to cleanse the spiritual house of His people (our hearts—the place that should be His dwelling place), would He be angry or pleased with what He found?

—Lt. Colonel Marlene Chase